Oh, Maker

I hear the drizzle of the rain

It's falling from my window

And in the corners of my mind

I hope that I'll get to see you again.

La da die da die da die da die my friend 

I heard the colors in the flowers

Just like the candle snugged at dawn

You're here, you're near, you're there and then you're gone

La da die da die da die da die 

Suffering in sinking sand 

All the hurt

See I'm really lost baby 

We suffered a rare, rare blue

So much hurt

On this earth 

But you loved me

And I really dared to love you too

Perhaps what I mean to say is 

Is that it's amazing that your love was mine 

Oh, Maker tell me did you know 

This love would burn so yellow 

Becoming orange and in its time 

Explode from grey to black then bloody wine

La da die da die da die da die 

Oh, Maker have you ever loved? 

Or known just what it was? 

I can't imagine the bitter end 

Of all the beauty that we're living in? 

Suffering in sinking sand 

All the hurt See I'm really lost baby 

We suffered a rare, rare blue 

So much hurt 

On this earth But you loved me 

And I really dared to love you too 

Perhaps what I mean to say is

Is that it's amazing that your love was miine

Lost inside a lonely world

where lovers pay the price.

Barely get the sound of music

to love and go dance to.

Now, it's time for us to go

and no one ever has to know

your love was in my pocket

and your eyes, eyes are in my, my soul....

No one will know it but me...

- J. Robinson

Gone

You get lost in other people's misery and confusion...
You find a way out. Even when they hold you down in it.

You just grab some of your shit, get up and go.

This is the point when you're at your lowest.
It ends up being the best time to start over, but our training
gives us that blanket of fear that prevents us from ever
applying for a passport.

If you don't break out now, you'll never know.
You'll end up the pushover victim of every one's unrealistic
expectations of you.

They'll even make you think that something is wrong with you...
Just to get from you what they want.

And that is some sick, lonely shit.

And selfish.
And uncaring.

So just go.



They won't really miss you because they never really wanted the you that you know.

It's only you.
But you love you...


Right?

Then its nothing for you to love yourself enough
To get the fuck up and just get into the wind.
Let it blow you away.




Go.

Get lost in yourself.
Eventually you will figure it out

That the misery and suffering had been brought on by you refusing to go.

2010 HassanOlumorotiNtimbanjayo

The Rent Has Been Too Damn High For A While Now...

I can't believe that its been more than a month since I've posted something on my blog.

To be honest about it, I haven't abandoned BWB, its just that... I've been busy. Unfortunately, I haven't been busy doing anything that I want to do. And that sucks ass. If anyone that reads me now that read me back in the day, then you know how I feel about participating in the matrix that we call the rat race. It is not for people such as myself, even though I benefit from certain aspects of it. Like owning web sites that make me a couple of bucks...

Never mind.

I'm not mad or angry or depressed. Some of you have asked me via email and offline and I haven't responded. On purpose. No need to respond. Nothing doing over here. I subscribe to what many o' grandmothers have told many of us a many of times: If you have nothing good to say, then say nothing at all.

I'm exercising that right. Hard for a blogger to do but...

I'm still wondering why it irks the fuck out of some of y'all, me not saying anything. When I was complaining about the socio-political landscape, I got a lot of grief (and rightfully so, we're all entitled to our opinion), when I gave my sideways commentary on the state of 'us', there were journalists (both real and blogger - there is a difference) that contacted me to go on record about current happenings... Nope, not going to do it. That's what the blog is for.

It's just seems that when I hollered about something, folk tried to shut me down and now... Oh boy tomorrow! A bunch of folk that have EVERYTHING, pissed that they must serve under this mysterious, secretive plotting black dude and his minions (even though we already have for 2 years now and I still haven't seen the stormtroopers hit the streets) will attempt to change the political landscape without one poly-sci class under their belt.

You can run for whatever office you want, this is a free nation BUT... Read a book and study about shit first. We all have realized through life experiences that when we make emotional decisions...

Fuck you! Don't tread on ME!!!

Tune in to any network tomorrow, you'll see what I mean. And I hope you vote. Bullshit needs an equalizer.

Anyhoo, the last few weeks have been a blur. It's hard to be engaged when you're not sleeping, running back and forth to hospitals and trying to relocate as well as care for things you still have working in your current location in attempts to move and pay it forward. Mostly, I've just been nodding my head (even if I don't agree), gathering info and dealing with a myriad of unrealistic demands placed on me. I've learned to prioritize though. That seems to be working.

It's still hard though, observing people who have shit complain about how they can't function within the shit they have. And it's not like they don't realize that they have a ton of shit! They just want others to ignore their own personal shit to deal with the shit they have because somehow, their shit is more important.

And that's a bunch of bullshit.

We live in a very lazy nation where most wealth (heal, wealth and knowledge of self) is inherited. We also live in a place where people from other places are very eager to do what we don't want to do. We're also still a very privileged nation. I guess our SUVs, big TVs and Playstation-Wiis take priority over who we be.

Protest requires walking. That means you don't spend $3 a gallon of gas to get to the town square.

Whatever, man.

Most people are ridiculous in how they spoil themselves and turn around and complain when you spoil yourself (even if you're not)... Because at that moment, you ain't paying attention to them.

Same shit, different day with not room for self improvement.

I just try to live outside of all of that bullshit. That mostly makes me silent.