It Might Be, It Could Be...

I see us, I feel balance,
we think we and see stability.
Us makes ours means investment is returned
with interest that never wanes.
Time spent cannot be wasted
cause' energy together is never exhausted.

Between us.

This I never felt before,
even in its newness this fit is righteous.
This comfort I found so soon in your spirit,
means our union won't break - Because I'm all up in it.
This moment has both reason and meaning,
firsts for us and never for anyone else.

Because I refuse to share.

copyright 2005 Hassan Ntimbanjayo - Yeah, I said it!!!



I had a dream that I had a child. Well not me, but "us". It was the first time we came together making love and the passion shared was that damn strong. I am very certain in that dream that we had that BC thing on lock, and I know that sometimes we encounter someone that has the same thoughts and cares that we do, but when two people are brought together in that manner, shit the big bang theory is redefined.

Got me writing poetry and shit.

Tossing and turning... It's damn near 3am right now.

I don't even wanna go to sleep. Like I'm gonna miss something.

Got me making plans and setting aside vacation time for next year.

Problem is, I thought I been here before. I haven't. Thought I had these thoughts before in past relationships,never have. No disrespect to those that came before, there is something very Godly that affected me in this case that never has before. And the wierdest thing to me is that I'm not afraid. That's my problem. Normally, I would have spazzed and totally destroyed things up by now, doing things to compromise what could have been. I would have ran away. It's not that I'm scared of commitment, I just didn't expect to get slapped in the face like this.

So soon, so sudden. All of a sudden there is someone that comes out of nowhere talking about dealing with my stank ass. Then I remember that I am not in charge. So I dig deep, investigate, talk and open up to the concept to see if this is a passing feeling. Dammit! It gets stronger. Oh snap, time spent together flows like we already knew each other. The vibe does not change, it actually gets stronger.

What did I do to get here? Well, I prayed, changed some things for the better (like my diet, friends and surroundings), I start to meditate and pray to gain focus and better spiritual balance and


WHAM!!!

I get delivered to someone and someone gets delivered to me as well. Like this is supposed to happen. Different backgrounds and upbringing but beliefs and goals are so similar. Faith is similar. Vibe is similar. Moved by the same things. See the same stuff while staring at the same picture at the art gallery. Finishing sentences.

I see this stuff in movies and of course, I read it. I do believe its happening, but I can't help but to question how and why it's happening to me. Not that I'm self deprecating, but damn, I thought an artist was supposed to struggle first. I thank the Almighty for delivering the only person (other than the cat that signs my check, oh and the inventor of porn - kidding, see Neena bout that) that has brought happiness (so far) in my adult life. That's a lot to say being with this in its infant stages, but damn, this cannot be wrong, because it feels so right.