Version 2.0

Culture, healing, politics and bullshit - Not necessarily in that order

The general, socio-political and very personal rantings and ravings of a hip hop head from the hood hustling for change... Of himself.

You all know me and are aware that I am unable to remain silent. At times to be silent is to lie. For silence can be interpreted as acquiescence.
—Miguel de Unamuno


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Tuesday, November 14, 2006

30 Days... 30 Posts: Day Fourteen

Release...

I can't create the effort to motion forward until the hands of time recognize my misnomer and we can make an agreement for me to be released from its grasp

all functionality flies out the window because of what you have done to me
From your lips to my ears down to my heart, I feel the wretched indigestion where nourishment used to go


my weakness blames itself on the last glance of your wicked frame
the cold that forces itself through my system causing uncontrollable responses of disease is the direct result of the last time my body felt your touch


you abandoned me in the simplest of forms making your voice the noise no longer at my beckon call, it causes my hatred of all things not you to go in your direction and point its finger directly in your vicinity

I want to destroy any trace of residue that you and yours from my mental, knowing that would cease me from being in existence... I am willing to take this risk

I have no other option

by tying all of me from ancestor to kingdom come into yours and by me leaping so far out on faith that I cannot jump back makes me want to topple the pillars at pharoe's place

My touch has been tainted by anti-life and my eyes can no longer lay themselves on the youth, I despise the future so

I have been betrayed

the pain from the knife wound you placed in my back feels far much better than the disdain I have created for you, I hope I never get the chance to share, for my wrath has destroyed planets, pulled stars and satellites out of orbit and have drawn solar flares millions of miles away from the sun

I pray for the day that you look at the sky

I want to scortch this plane of existence so that others can feel what I cannot rid myself of

the saddest thing is that I cannot die, being cursed to live in the brimstone pond that is your memory as I watch you walk with him, on top of heated stone


in my personal hell that is this life, I ask all of the gods and every deity combined to allow me to kiss you one more time so I can assure that you know what it is to breathe fire

my hate for you is my release

copyright 2006 hassan Ntimbanjayo






8 comments:

nikki said...

well DAMN. brilliant and moving as always.

Gallis said...

Dude. I think somebody needs a hug.

Anonymous said...

That was purely amazing. I told you that your talent is genius. You show it more and more every time you write.

Luke Cage said...

What's going on brotha Hassan? Always a pleasure to come by and be let into your uninhibited and unfettered thoughts. Tight line "the saddest thing is that I cannot die, being cursed to live in the brimstone pond that is your memory as I watch you walk with him, on top of heated stone" --totally instrospective for real...

aquababie said...

damn...damn...damn! this is something else. i loveit.

this reminds me so much of my issue with my ex-boyfriend. this is kinda what what he tells me now...through email of course. you must be channeling that cat.

The Stiltwalker said...

man. lotsa e-hate going on around blogger lately. this was well written nevertheless.

Anonymous said...

You better put a copyright on this one...I'm so tempted to copy & paste this and e-mail it to this a-hole,who I can't seem to officially close things with. Being that you're my blogbro, I'll do the right thing and not bite....
There is no other way it could be described. Good job.

princessdominique said...

Wow...I guess now that I'm back I need to go through the archives. As usual you wave a mighty pen.