Version 2.0

Culture, healing, politics and bullshit - Not necessarily in that order

The general, socio-political and very personal rantings and ravings of a hip hop head from the hood hustling for change... Of himself.

You all know me and are aware that I am unable to remain silent. At times to be silent is to lie. For silence can be interpreted as acquiescence.
—Miguel de Unamuno


Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Get Fixed Or Die Trying

Yo, I'm slipping.

I'm at a place physically where my body can't tanke another surgery. I've had 20 of em in the last year and a half. I am more than tired. I'm mentally exhausted when it comes to dragging my ass to medical facilities.

My medical team told me a few weeks ago to do no more. I was advised that there isn't much more they can do surgically (within reason) to get me beyond the point of where I am right now, and that actually disappointed me.

I am not in denial, but I absolutely, positively cannot be left like this.

As an engineering major, I have been trained and taught that there is more to everything than just to leave well enough alone. I know that there are advances in technology that can give me the sight I desire and leave me with the motor skills to function as a normal human being beyond all of the medical treatments.

My chief surgeon begs to differ.

I fired him last week.

I volunteered myself for some experimental, futuristic, George Jetson, crazy-type brain surgical shit that could possibly leave me vegetative or worse if things go wrong.

I feel like I owe it to myself to do everything I can in my power to fix what's broken so I can have a better quality of life. If I were not as educated in the process I would agree with my old medical team that my body could no longer stand surgical repair and I would accept being disabled and with handcuffed ability.

I ain't going out like that, son.

1 comment:

Rose said...

I don't know if you're a praying man but pray about it all. Maybe you could give your body some rest to strengthen up before any more medical surgeries. Ask God! He will lead you. Wishing you all the best!